February 4, 2004
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Tiff and I desperately need our own tv show. At the Rice Bowl today, the back of my fortune said something about winning a chance to pitch your idea for a tv show to 3 television execs. Our three target channels: ABC Family, F/X, or BET, all of which are known for their original, hilarious, and insanely popular television programs.
Everyday Tiff and I churn out quotes of PURE COMEDIC GOLD. We have been hailed by the most trusted names in television as being "uhh, who are you?," "call security," and "oh my god don't touch me!" All we ask for is a tv crew, that has a high tolerance for brilliance, and a low tolerance for not-funny-ness, who will follow us around 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 364 days a year (Tiff and I need one day off to make proper sacrifices to our lord: Pan, the amorous goat god).
Everyday, our show will answer tough Tiff and Lor-related questions. Questions like:
Was Tiff one of those freaky Munchkins in The Wizard of Oz?
Is Loretta really a man?
Are they lesbians?
Are they robots running on the power of cats?
Does Tiff collect dog poo?
Did Loretta eat a small child?
And much, much more.
Here's a taste of what you'll get:
Lor: It's like the villain guy in the old black and white films with those curly mustaches who tie chicks to train tracks. (pretends to finger a mustache) Nyah hah hah!
Tiff: The weird things is that they never stick around to see the hero save the girl. I mean, they tie the girl to the tracks to get the hero to come, why do they just let him save her?
Lor: And then it always ends the same way, with the villain cursing the hero, "Damn you...(shifty eyes)...Zorro!"
Tiff: Yeah, or, "Damn you Scarlet Pimpernel!!!"
Lor: HAHAHA...Scarlet--HAHA...Pimpernel? What the hell are you talking about?! We might as well have him say, "Damn you Tom Sawyer!"
Tiff: "I'll get you yet, Man in the Iron Mask! I'll see you in Monte Cristo with Musashi!"
It's only a matter of time my friends...only a matter of time...
Comments (6)
Hey baby, you just sit tight until the end of Feburary, cuz then it's FILMIN' TIME!
I think our fans deserve a little treat, don't you? An answer to one of the many tough questions: No, Tiff was NOT one of those freaky munchkins, she was the main flying monkey in The Wizard of Oz.
.......ARE we lesbians?
yes you are lesbos
and i love it haha j/k
so disturbing... yet... so fulfilling/sexy/intriuging/perfect....
hahah i was right all along! U guys are lesbians! So can i be ur best man?
I'm glad that you're happier now...I'm sorry that we didn't get a chance to kick it during the break. I hope we're still friends cuz I will always think of you as one of my great friends that I will always love...Take care...Chris
i'd definitely watch your show, if it was late at night... and nothing else was on... and my computer, radio, and books were gone. heheh.
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